Tuesday, June 30, 2009

It's A Sad World

Society. I must ask you now.Do you Remember The Time when a man inspired us to not Stop until We Had Enough? And once we did, he told us to Beat It.The Man in the mirror saw himself in Black and White.Because he realized it would take a Thriller to Heal the World.Do we mourn the loss of an icon? Does death seem more real to us now?Heroes aren't supposed to die.They're supposed to live forever.Our childhoods were supposed to always last.Our dreams are suppose to keep us alive. Perhaps the part of us that still believed in Neverland died a long time ago. And since we stopped believing in our imaginations, we had to destroy anybody who didn't give up on theirs.I wonder if the jokes will stop now. Now that he has lost his face, is he finally beautiful enough for society?Now that he has angel wings, is he finally white enough for the media?Now that he is gone, how many comedians have to re-write their act?This is what we do humanity. We take something beautiful and destroy it.
We do it to our bodies. We do it to our God. And we do it to our Earth.So today, we don't mourn the loss of an icon.We mourn the loss of what the icon represented in our own consciousness.We mourn the loss of our dreams. Our imagination. Our childhood.Do you remember the time? Do you remember the time?Back when we can play without fear of being judged.Back when we can fly without the fear of falling down.Back when we could smile, for absolutely no reason at all.We have spent so much time working, that we have forgot how to play.We have spent so much time standing still in our lives, that we have forgot how to dance.Not only have we robbed ourselves of our childhood dreams, but we have criticized others for following theirs.Perhaps Michael is now singing with God.Perhaps he is flying with Peter Pan.Perhaps he is now moon walking on the clouds of heaven.Wherever he is, I know that he is finally free.Free to be who he is, rather than a prisoner of who he was.
We haven't lost an entertainer. We have lost ourselves.And his death didn't happen in June of 2009. It happened many years ago.The killers of our inner child. The judges of our own fate. The builders of our own prisons.
Michael Jackson. I pray that you don't rest in peace.....I hope that you dance in it.
Credit: -www.travelingpoet.com by Apollo Poetry
Michael Jackson's life is such a tradegy. It is the saddest life story I have ever known in my entire life. Believe it.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

My Musical Hero


I was so in love.
When I was a little girl, my sister and I would glue our eyes to the television whenever his face appeared. My parents bought every single album and we've seen every single music video. My sister and I even performed some of his songs on our home videos. When I was five, I wanted to marry him. To me, he seemed so perfect and so beautiful. His red jacket from his video, 'Beat It',(I want a red jacket just like his.) his stunning white glove, and the moonwalk... wow. That man can move. Michael was the hottest bad boy in his other hit video, "Bad." It troubled me that Michael had a skin disorder and had gotten plastic surgery several times. && it turned out that he was never satisfied with himself with anything-from performing to his self-image. My family and I are intrigued and hooked on his God-given, "nobody can do it like me", musical talent. I am hurt and shocked by this sudden loss. It's a nightmare! My little cousin in London was shaken with tears and emotion because he wanted to meet Michael so very badly. I went to bed totally distraught and woke up completely saddened.

I watched all of his music videos with my sisters, reminiscing.My heart has some sort of pain banging inside of it. Michael Jackson was truly the greatest artist of all time. All the guys wanted to be him- to dance and sing like him, and the girls would past out at his concerts, and most of the time it wasn't from the heat! Seriously.He did a lot of charity as well(donating millions of dollars) and has effected the whole world. Literally.Michael Jackson is number three on the 'Top Superstars' list. (First is The Beatles, and the Second Elvis Presley) He broke many, many, racial barriers especially in music. (MTV refused to play his music a long time ago.)Michael Jackson is a global superstar. The King of Pop.He is my musical hero, a huge part of my childhood. When I listen to his music, I remember the good old days, those sunny day '90s. There is truly && honestly no one like him.I will never forget him, never ever. He's in a better place now. May he rest in peace, the peace that he never did receive here on earth.I pray for his family, fans, and friends. Michael Jackson will suffer no more.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Summer Love

There's no shame in writing about love. After all, God is love.
For a second, I was thinking that this blog was becoming a 'boylog.'
Then I realized that, love will never fail to cause my heart to flutter nor will I ever grow tired of writing about it. && I think- for sure, Captain Love will take me on a little ride on his loveboat.
It's Summer, darlings.
The sun becomes our enemy, our bestfriend, and the perfect backround for a kiss. Oh how my heart longs for the beach-to wear my pretty pink bikni and rage through the tasteful ocean waves with a surfboard. It's the most beautiful time of year for concerts and parties, as well as getting to know somebody. As of June 22, 2009 I have fallen in love with this beauty called, Summer. I just love the breeze Summer that brings, dancing wildly in hair. And these nights, oh these pretty summer nights, shining so beautifully like Hollywood City lights.It brings me my sweetest lullabys and I dream of happy things.My sister,Caroline is getting her first kiss this summer. She's fifteen. That's when I got mine at fifteen as well. :) I remember that kiss like a fond childhood memory. I remember I felt fireworks exploding inside of me, causing my face to break into a glittery beam. Literally.
My Silly, Silly Texting Machine.
From Stephanie Garcia at 4:46 pm June 22:Would you kiss Brody?
Me at 4:47 pm:Yeah lol!
Stephanie Garcia at 4:50 pm:Awwww lol!
Me at 4:50pm: Lol why?
Stephanie Garcia at 4:53 pm: Cause I'm sure he wants to kiss you too.
Me at 4:57pm:Aw :) But I want to take it slow with him. But of course I would kiss him. I like him!
Stephanie Garcia at 6:11 pm:Good :)
Me at 6:58pm: Lol! How many gf has he had?
Stephanie Garcia at 7:06pm:He's never had one. He kinda had one earlier this year, but they were never official. But he has kissed girls before and stuff. I don't think he's gone that far though.
Me at 7:00 pm: I was just want to keep things pure with Brody.
Stephanie Garcia at 7:05 pm: I understand.

Starting next week, I will start a mini story series called, Ocean Lyrics. A three day supply full of lyrics , old personal diary entries, Bible verses and stories about the joy of love. So clear your mind, grab your flipflops, your car keys, your friends and your cute bikinis and head down to Huntington Beach. Oh and don't forget the Starbucks.









Fun fact about Rose Valentine: She hates celery.


Monday, June 22, 2009

11:11


My sister and I always make wishes at 11:11.
But we do it in such a way as if we are praying... which we are anyway. We bow our heads and then we do the sign of the cross. Some of our wishes have come true. I pray for success in tumbling and my developing friendship with Brody Mingram. Everything is going well between us. We went on our second date last night. We watched another movie, 'The Proposal.' The date was nice and low-key. I was having a really bad hair day, so I hope he didn't mind.We didn't hold hands or wrap arms, but we sat rather close. I think it's best that I treat Brody as a brother, a best friend instead jumping into the physical stuff such as kissing, and act like a couple. I'm not really big fan of the physical stuff. The farthest I would go is kissing. I think innocence and purity in a relationship is the cutest and the most sweetest thing. That's what God wants. I want to get closer to Brody, because he's a great guy and I always feel at ease whenever I'm around him. I'm a hyper girl who tends to freak alot, so that says alot about this guy.

I try to surround myself with people whom I can praise and worship with. I'm trying to see where Brody places Christ in his life. I don't know much about his spiritual backround, but I know that he goes to church every Sunday. My spiritual life is very important and I want to be with someone who I can worship with. I believe that a godless relationship is a failing relationship. I'm getting God's permission on this boy. He know who I belong with, but lately I feel as if I'm better off alone. Lord, do you want me to be friends with Brody or later on become more than that?
&&
Jessica has been trashing me alot lately.
Saying that I'm this & I'm that.
"You act like a little girl with those bows in your hair, daddy's little princess- the typical cheerleader. Cheerleaders are dumb, it's just stupid.You look like a toddler. No older guys will want you." And at this rate, you're going to get married at like, 40 if you keep moving at this pace."

"I'm so tired of those people trashing you, Rose. You've done nothing wrong.You're a great person. I think that you are a very sweet girl, but you need to be more assertive. Don't let Jessica talk to you like that."

"Don't talk to her, Rose. Jessica is really mean.She acts like she's all experience and she isn't. First of all, she has no business dating college guys like that. She's so desperate meeting random guys online and having long distance relationships. "
I laugh.
I let her step all over me. I can't do that. Why must I do that? Jessica doesn't know anything. Supposedly, she thinks Brody isn't good enough. PLEASE, girl. You don't even know him. Shut your mouth. Why are yall going so slow? You're boring, Rose. You have got to remember that Brody is a sixteen year old boy. At least give him a kiss or something! Yall should be holding hands already. You two are just going to end up as friends.
Shut your mouth, Jessica. Just shut it.
I'm so tired- no, I'm so sick of her.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Names That I adore


GIRLS
1. Stassi (Nastassia) <3
2. Audrina
3.Gisbelle
4. Cristelle
5.Hillary
6. Courtney
7. Cameron
8.Kristen
9. Kaley(or Kailey)
10.Crystalina
11.Mikela


BOYS
1. Brody <3
2. Adam
3.Roberto
4.Rylan
5.Chandler
6.Jeremiah
7.Rayne
8.Lyric
9.Giovonnie
10.Titus
11.Andrew

Last Names:
1. Love
2.Paris(my best friend's last name. Natalia Paris. Isn't that pretty? =)
3.Angel
4.Carboni
6.Carmicheal
7.Menefee

What names do you like? :D

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

You need to talk to me

Brody and I talked last night.
I couldn't stop laughing.
Not because that boy has a killer sense of humor, but I was just so nervous.
Yeah, I know. Way to calm down, Rose.
Dialing Brody's number was actually pretty difficult. Come to think of it, I don't talk to many guys. I have a nice crowd of good guyfriends, but I'm just not that close. I'm very close to Liam Wang and I use to be "brother and sister" with James Kaferney(remember him, girls? I mentioned him a lot on here) but James and I don't talk anymore. I sort of kept my distance.
Long story.
Anyway, I can't talk to guys who I am romantically interested in. I prayed for courage before I dialed Brody's number. I'm telling you now girls, that I can't date. I am such an awkward dater. And I am beginning to believe that because of my quote on quote,"girliness."And I giggle.
A whole lot.
"Rose, you do have a nervous laugh and really, you laugh at nothing... all the time. my sister commented.
I pouted.
"Like, seriously you were laughing the whole time at the resturant when that hot waiter boy cracked a joke. You always giggle when you're talking to like, any guy."
I did too much of it last night.
"You are such a giggler, Rose." Brody stated. I immediately got a hold of myself. "I'm sorry, um am I annoying you?"
"No, it's fine I mean, I just want to know what's funny, haha!"
I seriously could not help it. When there was silence of the phone, I giggled some more to make up for what I should of been discussing with him- the text. The "what are we?" text. That's very important. I tried to bring it up. "Um... um..."
Ugh.
After last nights conversation, I'm actually having second thoughts on Brody. Why? I have my reasons. Last Saturday night, we didn't even mention our "possibility" date on Sunday. Monday I asked him if he wanted to hang sometime this week. No mention of that either. And one major thing- he texts. Unnecessarily. I didn't mention that before and after the movie, Brody was texting. And when we were on the phone for the very first time, he was texting then as well! I'm sure he was just as nervous as I was but, that's not an excuse to be disrespectful. I see it like this:"Do you want to be on this date with me or not?" "Do you want to talk to me or not?" So, of course I confronted Brody about it last night. "Who are you texting? I scoffed."I mean, I'm not trying to sound bossy or anything, but you're on the phone with somebody." And then, Brody came up with a silly excuse of how the beeping noise gets really annoying and it lasts forever (yeah sure.) if he doesn't answer the text soon.
Fine. Whatever.
?
Oh, and did I mention that for a second, I thought he hung up on me? Just a few seconds before that happened, Brody threatened to hang up on me because I said, "So, aren't you happy that the Lakers won the NBA championships?" He was just joking, and so was I, and then before I knew it, I heard silence on the other end. Outraged, I sent Brody a, "Did you hang up on me?" text and called Jessica. She got furious. "You're trying to make conversation and then HE HANGS UP? Get that boy on the phone, Rose." " No, Jessica. I refused, firmly. "That's really not necessary, I mean-" Then Brody called me back a few miuntes later and told me that the battery in his phone was dying. "I didn't hang up on you." I switched lines and told Jessica the news. "Bull crap."She spat."But, I'll leave you to talk to him." What was wrong with Brody last night? I mean, he's a nice guy and everything but, he doesn't know how to make phone conversation... at all. I couldn't help but get very frustrated. In my head I'm shouting, "HEY. Boy, I thought you LIKE me, so wouldn't you want to ,I don't know... TALK to me?"

Tonight will be better, and I'm going to tell Brody firmly that texting while you're on the phone with not only me, but with other people is very disrespectful. And gosh, I'm sitting here trying to get to know this boy who is interested in me, and he's barely making any effort to make an active conversation. I mean I know Brody is into me, because he was being flirty last night. He was trying to be funny by twisitng everything that I said,making jokes, etc, Still, Jessica got very cross. "He was texting while yall where on the phone? She hissed. "There is something wrong with him And this is the very reason why I don't date guys our age. He's just an immature sixteen year old boy. See, people who text like him don't have any people skills." I have to say that my old boyfriend, Chris Angel was much better with communication than Brody, and they're the same age. I know it's not fair to compare Brody with Chris, but it's very true. Chris talked a lot and we would talk for hours. No awkward silences... ever. But Brody is sweet and I really do like him. I'm not going to forget the feelings I had when he held my hand and wrapped his arms around me.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

& the wall kept tumbling down?



& the wall kept tumbling down?
Tumbling down?
Uh no.
Rewind, please!
Me: "Yeah so, what are you up to?"
Brody:"Nothing really. Just wondering, what do you think of me?"
At this moment I burst out laughing... wait, what?
Me:"I think that you are a really sweet, cute, funny, and a smart person. Someone who is really cool and is easy to talk to." :)
I felt my heart do something funny. This was probably the most semi- uncomfortable texting conversation I have ever had. Where was this leading to?
Brody: "Oh ok cool. Like, any feelings for me?"
Oh my gosh, why is he being so straight forward?! My heart was pounding. I DO feel something for Brody... don't I? Why of course there some sparks there, but they're not very strong or maybe I'm forcing them to it's weakest point.
Me:"Yes. Why are you asking?"
Brody: "I am just wondering what kind of level we are on that's all. I am beginning to like you too. =D
Me:"I was thinking that too,actually. Well, what do you think of me?"
Brody:"Cool =p. I think that you are just everything and that you're beautiful and don't have sass lol."
I was beaming.
Me: "Aw you really think so?"
Brody: "Ya. =D
Me:" :D. You made my night."
& the wall kept tumbling down?
Brody: "Aww really?" =D
Me:"Yeah. I can't stop smiling. :)
I need to repair my wall, or actually start building it. So far, I'm letting Brody Mingram in further and further. I'm becoming too available. I'm not handing out my heart to him. A huge part of me feels that we're definitely moving a lot faster than our hearts wants us to. I want to pull up the strongest guard. How can he chase after me if I'm already making myself a target? We haven't even know each other for a month. This can't just become a summer fling, because someday in the near future, I want something much more than that.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

I'll give you chance

"So when are we chillin' again, Rose?"
Brody and I are going on our second date tomorrow night. I cannot believe he wants to see me again and so soon too.
I love it. I absolutely love it.
He texts me every single day and last night he was being immensely sweet. He made my night. I just gotten back from an amazing Fray concert with my best friend Evan Blare and we were both thoroughly soaked from the heavy rain. Sitting in wet clothes on a fifty minute drive is not comfortable in the least. I texted Brody back on the way to Evan's house. He repiled, "Hey cutie, what up?"
Then we were just texting about things and then he asked me if I were busy this weekend. I was thinking of making a picnic just for the two of us tomorrow evening at the park, but he doesn't know where it is. And the flies on the food would annoy us both.Most likely, we're going out for lunch or dinner sometime this coming week. But man, I'm just so broke. Who knew dating can get so expensive?! I need to start that babysitting job. The only thing that's holding me back from doing so is cheerleading.I don't want Brody paying for every single date... unless he doesn't mind.
"Well, goodnight. :)
"Goodnight, beautiful. =)."

I'm giving Brody a chance.
I just think that a part of me is just afraid to like him, fear of falling fast and getting attached. I just want us to get to know each other and date until we become "Rose & Brody." But oh my goodness, I'm just so happy.
"I'm so happy that you found someone, Rose."
"WOO. Girl, you scored him."

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Love Scared


He held me in his arms and grabbed my hands in the most romantic way.
Everything felt right.
I can remember everything.
Especially the way I was afraid of being touched. My body chemistry was bad, but I had no intention to be rude. I was just really nervous. Brody Mingram had come up to me at our meeting spot in the mall with such confidence, and hugged me. He is an incredibly tall, broad shouldered guy with such a cute face. I trembled... literally. He then graciously paid for my movie ticket and asked me what I had done that day. I bought him a smoothie , and two packs of Sour Patch Kids (his favorite)then we were off to the movie. The movie theater warmed up and I was beginning to sweat. So, I kept my hands and feet to myself, making it pretty clear that I didn't want to cuddle. It was a scary movie and I would squeal and scream and shake. Brody Mingram wasn't really paying attention to the movie. He kept glancing my way, making comments about the movie, and asking me repeatedly if I were alright. At the time, it didn't click in my mind that he wanted to hold me. "Are you okay, Rose? You look really scared." "Are you okay, Rose?" And every time I would reply with a breathless laugh and say, "Yeah, I'm fine."
He didn't buy it.
Regardless, I kept my eyes forward, praying to God that I wasn't sweating profusely. It wasn't just the heat that was making me sweat. Actually, it wasn't that hot. It was Brody making me sweat. As the movie progressed, Brody suddenly whispers to me, "This part gets really scary."
I looked at him with a smile. "Really?" I believed him. He had seen the same movie two weeks ago." Yeah, he said. He then opened up his arms. "Want to prepare?" I gave in and I was locked in his arms. I could hear and feel his steady heartbeat and his breathing had magically calmed me down.
&& then Brody slowly but surely locked his fingers into mine. It was amazing. His gesture was perfect and incredibly romantic. I would look at our hands and see my purity ring glisten in the faint light. He squeezed my hand once and when I squirmed from the awfully gross scenes, he held me tighter. You can imagine how I was feeling. I have to say, a tiny alarm went off my head. You just met him , girl. What are you doing? This is the first date, you can't cuddle on the first date. You moving fast and that is exactly what you want to avoid. But I wasn't feeling uncomfortable. I felt safe and protected. And then as soon as the movie ended, I pulled away. For a few seconds, Brody just stared right ahead and then we gathered our things and headed out. Perhaps I had pulled a little bit too quickly. Looking at him I mumbled, "I'm going to use the restroom."
"Okay."
As soon as I had found an empty stall ,I emptied my bag and reapplied deodorant and my favorite Victoria's Secret body spray. I then checked my face and my hair then left. Brody was standing against the wall, texting. He smiled when he saw me approach and then we left. Sadly without a car and with just a learner's permit I had to wait for my ride. Brody has his license and a car. I felt like such a little girl. Or maybe I am one. :/(I don't get my license till November. And a car? Probably end of senior year.) How embarrassing.He waited with me. I told him that he didn't have to, but he insisted. "I would feel bad if I leave a girl stranded out here. I can't do that." Meanwhile, we spoke while checking our phones and I handed Brody his gift. When my mom finally arrived, I introduced him, we took a picture, and we departed. About thirty minutes later, I had gotten a text from Stephanie Garcia who was ecstatic, and from Brody.
"I had a good time tonight. =)"
We texted each other for the rest of the night. There was another big NBA game we were both watching. He's a Magic fan and I'm for the Lakers. I then spoke to my friend, Jessica Davis and we talked about my date. We talked for hours. Jessica is my 'love doctor' so whenever we talk, it's serious. According to her, Brody had made a fast move. "He needs to back it up. You can't do that on the first date! He's way ahead of himself." But cuddling is innocent, and it's not like I was feeling violated. "And Rose, you need to calm down. I mean seriously, there's nothing wrong with holding hands on the first date. Gawd, even if he accidentally brushed against your boob(which he did... accidentally when he tried to hold my hand.) you would freak out and get all crazy." We busted out laughing. She was right. Honestly, I did freak out just a bit.
I moved back a little and got less closer. At first, I thought he was trying to touch me because, it happened more than once, and then I realized that we were both sitting at a weird angles and whenever he moved he just accidentally touched me... right? Yeah, Rose. Duh. He was holding your hand! But crazy thoughts soon scattered my mind. "Wait, oh my gosh is he really trying to touch me? Is he touching me?! Now c'mon, girl. You would know for sure if he were touching you. Relax and watch the movie.But of course, I didn't tell Jessica that. I also have to make sure that Brody opens doors, etc as well. I actually wasn't paying attention to that, but those gestures are very important. && come to think of it, I don't think he did open doors.He held them open but... I mean, he let me choose the seats in the theater,("Yeah, so he can look at your butt, Rose." Jessica stated.) he paid for my ticket, and asked if I were alright, etc.
The second date, I'm watching Brody's actions. He's really sweet, intelligent,(because he's always proving me wrong, haha.) and he's easy to talk to. I wanted him to tell me that I looked pretty ,but he would gaze at me from time to time.and maybe he was too nervous to say anything.
"You're really sweet."
"Ha really? How so?"
"Ha well.... :). You paid for my ticket and then you waited with me and then you calmed me down during the movie."
"Hahaha oh well this is true. =).Wanted to make u happy."
&& I am so love scared.
I talked to my friend, Daynee Cash about these new feelings and she gave me sincere advice. I told Jessica as well. "Don't be scared, girl. Jessica spoke, softly.I don't want you to be scared. Talk to Jesus about it." And she also stated,
"Hmm, he's a six two, fine basketball player with a car? Be careful, girl. He sounds like a jock. And they're usually not that bright and they do things. Plus he's the same age as you and guys our age are stupid. And you ARE dateable, Rose. Don't tell yourself otherwise.I mean, you're cute, you're a cheerleader, and you're popular. Boys want to date you ,and even though a lot of them know that your sexually pure, they're still going to try you."
I'm building a wall.
I want to be a chase.
But I'm so love scared, and if Brody Mingram really does want to be with me, he's just going to have to make those walls tumble and fall. I don't hand out my heart like valentines. He has to earn my heart.
I have to relax, but I'm not going to "make myself at home" and be comfortable. I have to search him some more. I'm a terrible dater. I was laughing at everything he said and also with my terrible body chemistry I won't be surprised if Brody thought, "Dang, what is her problem? She acts all interested on facebook and through texting, and then we go out, she doesn't say anything!"
&& Brody and I are definitely more than friends.
Yeah?

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

I want to look perfect for you tonight.



Do you like me?

If you saw me standing there alone, in the crowd, would you look back twice?

Do you think I'm pretty, pretty enough for you?

Well, silly boy this is all I've got. And if I'm not enough for you, don't bother. Find someone else.

Take me as I am.

I hope you think I'm worth your time, and that I'm not the so-called, 'typical cheerleader.'

Maybe my hair is not at it's best or that my legs aren't sexy, but tonight I'm taking the time to look perfect... just for you.

I'm not doing anything for myself tonight. I'm trying to impress you silly boy, can't you see?

Take me as I am.

I'm meeting Brody Mingram tonight and I woke up with some killer butterflies. You haven't a clue. And, I'm going alone.

Not very clever right?

Brody Mingram is harmless. I may sound like a stupid, naive, girl right now, but trust me on this one girls. Stephanie Garcia is one of my closet friends and certainly, she wouldn't set me up with a dangerous boy. I'm going alone,and since the date change was so last mintue(Me and Brody's schedules totally clash. Date was suppose to be Wednesday.) I can't double date with my sister. It would of been inconvient for her date. Stephanie is out in L.A as well so... Besides, I've been paired up with a guy the very same way before. Some of you girls may remember my old boyfriend, Chris Angel? Yes, this is very much similar. One of my best friends, Melanie Lane set me up with one of her best friends which is, Chris Angel. We did the whole facebook- phone thing then met on a football game date. All last September. Anyway, I have two summer dresses picked out for tonight.

The Angel and The Riley. I name my clothing and jewlery sometimes. I have a thing for names. :) I should of taken pictures of the dress, but it's alright. I'm battling between the two. I'm leaning towards The 'Mark' Goddess (aka. 'Angel') Mingram and I are going to the movies. I wish I had some cute jean shorts instead of a dress. With the shorts I can wear my favorite polo and wear a bow in my hair.

I don't want to send," I am trying SO HARD to look good for you," signals. That's wrong. Times like this, I wholeheartedly wish I had an older sister. :(

You know what?

I'm wearing whatever I see fit. I'm wearing The Angel.

And in the meantime, sneaking into my sister's closet. :) We're thirteen months apart and we're tight. She wouldn't mind.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

To Cute Boy


For you I will...

  • Hug you all the time
  • Text you good night
  • Pack you lunches
  • Kiss you on the nose
  • Give you a 'Comfort' basket when you're sad

&& I will treat your heart like the prettiest gem in the jewlery box.

I like happy things and making other people happy. I make my friends signs all the time. I wish I can become a 'Comfort' doctor when I grow up. I want to make people feel better and give them presents when they're upset. I enjoy gift-giving a lot.

:)

Thursday, June 4, 2009

I wonder what love feels like

Is love like make-up, does it cover up all the flaws, making everything look perfect?

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. "- 1Corinthians 13 4:8

I wonder what true love feels like.
I hope it literally keeps me breathless, wanting for more. Shaking, trembling, desiring nothing else but that strong sense of warmth. I want my love to be a mess- so perfect and unperfect at the same time.
I want my true love to be real, to keep me in check and help me believe in the unreachable.
I want a passionate kiss, arms wrapped around me, whispering innocent lyrics in my ear. I want love to send me closer to Christ, holding my hand in the dark and in the light.
I want love so sweet and powerful, that makes fireworks explode inside of me.
I want true love like a song, a sweet sounding melody.

Is love like make-up,does it cover up the flaws, making everything look perfect?
Reckless.
I want the love to be reckless.
A chase.
A steady roller coaster, a wrecked sailboat.

I want to look at that ripped photograph of my true love and say, "Man. What a hot mess."
Captain Love, I think you've got me. I think I'm tossing my independent shoes in the ocean, were my broken heart is in its rightful place.
But Captain, before you say, "All aboard!" I've got to look at true love in the eye.
Human hearts break way too easily.
I rather be on my own.
And if I'm saying this to you, I'm lying.



Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Meeting Brody Mingram

I think.... I think just maybe, Captain Love may take me away on his little sailboat.
It's just a thought.
A thought that hopefully, Mr. Cutie ponders as well.
" He thinks you're really pretty, Rose." My friend Stephanie Garcia told me on the first day of summer. That's when I met Brody Mingram on facebook. The first day of this beautiful summer. Stephanie had shown me a picture of Mingram on her iphone before I accepted his friend request. He's a "Mr. Cutie" for sure. I grinned when I saw his picture. He had a nice smile. And when Stephanie told me that he wanted to talk to me, I promise you- my heart danced. My day was going well, but then it got even better. I could not wait to get home from a glorious afternoon spent with my girls(driving around while blasting music, drinking milkshakes, playing on the playground, and eating at Frontera) to accept Mingram's friend request. Mr. Cutie sent me a message about two days after and we started talking from there. Then he asked for my number about three or four days after. At the moment, we are texting each other like mad. Every single day.It's insane. I have never texted someone so much. And I usually hate it. We would literally text each other all day.
I want to hear his voice.
&& I can't say he's Troy yet. We will see. He has some of the qualities, but I need to search deeper. The search is going to take awhile. I don't want to rush.Mingram is a really cool kid
though. And he's extremely friendly.
And he asked me out on, what I call a 'meet and greet' date. I think? Ha, here are the texts.

Me- "Yeah, I haven't been to the movies in a while."
Mingram-"Then go see one aye."
Me-"Haha yeah I will when I get back."
Mingram-"Maybe I can go with you ha."
At this point I was like, 'Omigosh.
Me-"Hahah yeah that would be fun. :)
Mingram-"Alright that sounds good." =)

It's been a very long time since I've been on a date. My last one was way back in October and that was my first date. Obviously, I am no boy magnet. The date is next week and it's a huge deal for me, considering the fact that I'm meeting Mr. Cutie for the very first time. My sister, Caroline thinks that I should invite our friend Stephanie Garcia just in case you know? "Rose, how can you two go on a date if you don't even know what y'all sound like?" I'm not sure. I kind of want to be on my own on this one. I honestly don't think Mingram would hurt me. Stephanie told me that he's excited. :) I am as well. I've even made a 'Meet and Greet' Date checklist for myself yesterday. I'll post later. It's rather long, lol. :)