Everything

Writing is everything to me. Time and time again, I told myself that I would keep up with this blog all of college.  I haven't done that, clearly. Last night I made the decision to blog religiously on here. This blog is so precious to me.

Boy, was I broken. And my, how powerful God's miracles are. As I'm sitting here quietly, savoring every bite of my Thanksgiving ice cream, I'm reflecting on how I can grow stronger with this blog that is so near and dear to me. 

Last night I was at a movie night with Brad Incredible and our friends. That's when I rediscovered this blog. Something was pulling on my heart strings to try again. I read a lot of my old posts on here. It was a bit painful yet relieving on how much I revealed and wrote about  the darkest and happiest pieces of my teenage life. I am a different person now, singing songs of hope. I look into the mirror and see failures that have given me sense of self. Victories are the delicate rose petals on a stem, but the failures are the stems in my life that push me to keep myself together. I no longer cry myself to sleep. 

My heart aches for my teenage self. I wish I could tell her so many things that were not so important then and still aren't. Lately, people from my past have been hauting me, giving me signals that are conflicting my emotions.  What is this? Who are you? I am a woman who loves to move on. And move on quickly. Insecure? Heavens, no. It takes strength to let people go. I believe people are meant to stay for a season, and everything happens for a reason.

Life tells me that our lives are stories. Written with characters- you, your family, your friends, everything. These stories, our lives are written daily. Even the memories we cling onto can become our newest chapter. Life is the funniest thing on earth that can make us cry. 

Everything has changed. 

I am a woman who knows who she is, not dwelling on what I ought to be. I'm strong now,blog world. Let me recite the lyrics to my new song. 

I am worthy. I can do this. I am loved.