Gosh, give me a break

Homecoming Football game tonight.

Why am I not there?

In my highschool career,I have never had a friday night without football is in season... yill now.

This week was just full of disappointments, stress, and drama. My girls and I are not behaving our best with each other. We have suddenly broken off into pairs and rarely share secrets with each other. Out of Mel, Evan, and Savanna, I am closest to Evan. Evan and I have always been so incredibly close. Besides my sister, Evan gets the full story of my life. To make this story short and to the point, us girls are not getting along as well as we use to. There's been Homecoming drama and all kinds of nonsense. Evan and I are just sick of it. Besides that, several things have just been awful and I always feel like I need to pitch a fit. My grades are slowly taking over my life and is affecting my relationship with Christ. I had a nice talk with Brody last night about time. My time.He basically said that I'm always really busy and that hinders us from spending time with each other. This actually did hit me when he told me this and I was beginning to see the truth. I told Brody that I need to make more time for him and he agreed. He was being very calm and mature about it and I really did appreciate that. Me and Brody's dating relationship is very relaxed and free. There's absolutely no pressure. Brody expresses his affections not so much with words, but with his actions. Sure, we act like bestfriends/ brother and sister, but whenever he grabs my hand or kisses me angelically on the forehead, I know his feelings are there. Our first kiss still brings fire to my soul. It was perfect.

My darlings, belive what I am telling you. Yes, it has been two days since I have written to you all last,and things have changed... already? I desperately need a break from people.I'm home tonight because I have two papers to work on, I am exhausted, I have to prepare for my sister's Confirmation at EIGHT FORTY-FIVE AM ,and quite frankly,I just don't care about Homecoming anymore. I don't even want to attend the dance. I am so incredibly disappointed that Brody's mother wouldn't allow him to go with me. I just couldn't help but be slightly angry and just thoroughly upset.Brody felt horrible and I performed well by hiding mydisappointment, until our friend Alexandra confronted him last night. I wish she didn't do that, but its quite alright. She told me that Brody was really sad that he couldn't go to Homecoming with me and hoped that I wasn't truly mad at him. I was never mad-just really really disappointed. He had texted me after talking to Alexandra and I could tell he was still feeling bad. Oh well. It's such a shame!!! But, Brody's homecoming is in two weeks and I hope he asks me. I think that is the reason why I'm not looking forward to Homecoming. Evan and I are the only girls in the group without dates. That's not a problem anymore, because there are like, five guys who are solo as well. I'm just jealous of Savanna and Mel because they expressed their excitement at lunch while Evan and I were like, "Yeah... whatever. Let's get this dance over with." On a lighter note, I am finally having some chill time and I'm going to get my nails done. No regrets tonight. :)

An update on life

My darlings, it is so gorgeous out today. How I would love to get out of the house and shop. School was cancelled due to yesterday's flooding... and the sun suddenly broke out from the sky. I am loving this day off more than ever before. I am more than halfway down with my research paper and I got nine hours of sleep. I can honestly say for these little things, I am quite happy. I get my license on Brody's birthday((November 9th!) and a car that following weekend. I can hardly wait. Homecoming is on Saturday and our football team has beasted every single game we've had so far. My history and math grade is getting better and I'm getting a's in evil-ex nun lady's class.I surprised my old friends just a couple weeks ago and even bumped into my middle school sweetheart. && I must say that he still has that handsome face I met five years ago. Zach Knight, is his name and he was so sweet that night. He was stuttering and seemed to be very flustered. He had sent me a text saying this, "You blow my mind away. I couldn't believe it... I was stuttering and I was nervous. God, you are so beautiful. I want to see you again."

I've learned so many things about myself this month.It's quite moving. Perhaps I am really growing up. I look into the mirror and I can hardly recognize myself. I'm becoming more confident and sure of my decisions. Just last night at exactly 11:11, I planned out my life withsister, Caroline.I am going to attend Colombia U and become the "Legally Blonde lawyer/cheerleader. I seriously want to be just like Reese Witherspoon with her cute pink suit and matching dog.This blog will become a published book and I will be able to spoil my parents. Caroline is going to become a doctor and then a few years later, we will get our own flat in L.A, shop in Paris, and meet very handsome cowboys by then names of Moses and Troy. :) Caroline gets hot man MOSES and of course I get my knight and shining armor... Troy.

I love being a teenager.

It's me, dear. Rose Valentine.

Are you content with your life right now?

No. Why? Let me tell you why.

I'm feeling school stress. SAT's, college, GPA, yeah the stuff that determines where my career should start off. Oh and did I mention that I wish I had money and that I didn't begin my cheer dreams so late? I really really want to be a college cheerleader but I have to work my butt of now and senior to make it on an all girls squad. I'm willing to do that though.&& I am absolutely envious of my friend Tyler Whitley. She has it all. Honestly. Her life is too great. I can say I would rather trade spots with her than with anyone else right now.

How does the weather make you feel today?It's dark out. I'm feeling alright.

What do you want right now?

The ability to be so intelligent that studying for the SATS would be a waste of my time. And I want my license. (November 9th.) My backhandspring and some random junk on fredflare.com. Ha.

Do you have a relationship with Christ?

Jesus is my boyfriend. I've come to learn that that's the only thing in my life that won't let me down. He's the most important boy in my life and will probably be the only important boy.

What do you like most about yourself?

I'm sweet.

What have you learned about yourself as of now?

Slightly naive and I can be too soft with certain people. Not a good thing. And also, cheerleading gives me the attention I like. One of the reasons why I'm not giving it up and continuing in college.

Who is the angel in your life?

Every single one of my friends. Both boys and girls... so beautiful they are.

Who is the most handsome guy you know?

My daddy.

What are you looking forward to?

Homecoming with Brody. :) Cheering at a football game. And the end of my research paper.

Who makes you laugh?

Brody Mingram. Ming. Mingram. Mingo Mango. :)

Do you believe in letting go?
I don't know how to answer this question...

Ever been used?
I think I'm being used right now. I cried about it earlier this week while I was studying for evil ex nun lady's vocabulary test. I can't ask right now if I'm wrong or not. I'm timing the whole situation. Then again, I a huge part of my heart knows that I am not being used and that it's the outsiders who are putting ideas in my head.

If you had a horse, what would you name him or her?
Titus. He will be my knight in shining armor.

Is anyone mad at you right now?
I hope not...

Do you believe in finding true love at a young age?
Of course I do. There is no "age" nor "timing" when you can fall for someone.

Do you want to write a book someday?
Oh for sure. I have big plans this year for this blog especially.

Do you wish you looked like someone else or are you satisfied with yourself?
Oh my gosh I would love to like the head cheerleader, Michelle Plumer. She is absolutely gorgeous, dear Lord. She's such a sweetheart and she has ALOT of brains too. I'm not the prettiest girl in the world, but I won't call myself ugly.

Pink or red?
Pink. That has been my favorite color since kindergarten.

First bestfriend's name?
Natalia Paris and Hannah Frank. Natalia I met in preschool and we're still soul sisters. Hannah I met in kindergarten and we don't talk anymore. We just drifted off.

The HOTTEST male name ever?
Or names? Titus, Brody, Troy, and Adam.

Blue or green eyes?
Ocean blue. Gorgeous blue.

Favorite perfume or colonge?
Coco Chanel. And axe smells pretty good to me. :)

Your last text message says...?
"Oh yah it got canceled yesterday. :( so we're just gunna design it in 7th and 8th period so i'll b at lunch! :D- Evan

Tyra Banks or OrpahWinfrey?
TYRA BANKS.

Anyone's voice you want to hear really really badly right now?
Sophia Niccum.

What's happening tomorrow?
Red, White, Blue day at school for September 11. North game with Evan to visit old friends. Excited!!

Who do you facebook stalk? BE HONEST.
Oh Lord here we go...
1) Chris Angel(old boyfriend ha!)
2) Brody
3) Samir(BAHAHAHA)
4) Caroline (my sister)
5) Sophia :) LOL.
6)Stephanie Garcia
7)Annnd a bunch of other people.

Baseball or soccer?
NEITHER. Football, tennis, and all star cheerleading all the way...

How superficial are you? WITH YOURSELF.
I obsess over my teeth. Majorly. And my hair. I hate trying new things with my hair.

Got any online friends whom you've never met, but are your bestfriends?
Kimmy(one year), Kelcee(3 years), Dave(a month), and Sophia(It feels like forever!). :) But I've met every single one of them in my heart. So actually yes, I have met them.

Do you eat apples?
Organic! Daily.

Does your mom still pack your lunch?
Fo sho.


What should you be doing right now?
Going to sleep.


Songs you fall asleep to the most?
Fall for You by Secondhand Serenade, Red light by David Nail, and I Stay In Love By Mariah Carey.

Hold grudges?

No.