I'm back

I have heartburn.

I'm burning my own heart.

I thought second chances were the best and sweeter than the first.

My "fantasy" world is creating me a bittersweet reality. One second, I'm drooling, gazing, and falling head over heels and then a few moments later, I'm positively ticked because he said something or did something rather stupid.

He claims he's changing. I'm either blind or he's not changing at all. I see he has become more honest, but when things don't go his way, he's dramatic. Everything is still one-sided with him.

Therefore, I see no change.

But when I see him, everything feels brand new. We can't stay cross with each other for very long, which is a rather good thing.

I wonder if all of this is even worth it. Perhaps I expect too much, I'm "nitty picky" at what is bad and stale. Do I not praise him enough? Of course, I do. I adore this fellow and he knows it. He adores me as well, but when it comes to compromise, he desires his own ways.

Typical behavior? That is how my dad acts towards my mother. Maybe that's how men are.

*Shrugs.*

Sorry. I'm not trying to generalize..

Alright, fine love. I'll be gone like the wind.

It's as if I'm just in "it" just to feel something like love... as if it can't come again.

I don't know, but this is making me angry. There's one flaw that I cannot accept of myself: I never know what my heart is saying. Never.

I'm back, loves.

Senior year has been rather different. I'm very busy with my life, but I still think about this blog. I actually fear it, because I know I am no longer an active blogger and I know some of my readers are giving up. Don't worry. Why would I let this go? And you can always contact me at, jesusinyoureyes@gmail.com

I love emails.