Let's not get too close, shall we?
I get attached to people.
And I hate it.
I can almost see another disaster happening for me, I pray that I have the strength to stop myself from doing this to the next person. I don't want to hurt myself again. That wound was just too deep.
I'm very much attached to my sister, Caroline. We are thirteen months apart so we're really really close. She's my bestfriend. We are able to steal each other's clothes, makeup, ipods, etc without getting cross with each other. It's really nice. We are shopping and gym partners and we text each other too. I love her so much. She has two bestfriends, Karen and Winston and at times (I have to admit) I get jealous when she tells them secrets and stories that she hasn't told me yet. I know, I know. Ridiculous.
I finally got to see Brody Friday night. We had a really nice date. We were planning to eat out and see a movie, but time wouldn't allow it, so we watched a movie instead. District 9 was our first pick, but Brody has been"riding dirty" and forgot his id/license. He's not even seventeen yet, but he could pass for eighteen and he manges to get into R rated movies anytime. I didn't bother trying my permit, so we had no choice but to see Post Grad.(Which was BEYOND terrible.Waste of money.) Brody and I act like brother and sister rather than a "touchy-feely" couple,and I like that a whole lot. He makes me laugh so much and we're finally getting comfortable around each other. I can act anyhow without feeling stupid or embrassed like the previous dates. I really do like this boy. It's so touching how he actually wants to hear what I have to say. When the movie was about to start, he grabbed my hand and I immediately snuggled up to him and put my head on his shoulder. I love how we both have the same values-everything is just innocent. && as the movie progressed, Brody kissed my forehead. It was so sweet. I kissed him back on the cheek in response. Brody would kiss my forehead at random and just after I kissed him on the cheek, he turned his head and we melted into real kissing.
I honestly hate using the word,"making out" although it was more than a peck. But it was sweet kissing, gentle, and self-controlled , and we were still holding each other's hands. We actually kissed alot. :) It was really lovely. Although, I think( since we both had a little bit of a cough) I'm getting slightly sick. No, no, it's totally not mono. I've never gotten mono but I know it can get pretty serious. I'm feeling fine, just that my cough got slightly worse. Lucky Brody, his went away. HAHA. My friends and everyone else is waiting for us to stop dating and become official. It's been three months since we've started dating. I was actually hoping Brody would ask me to be his girl that very night after those kisses, but perhaps we are already official. We're not into anyone else but each other.
Sigh. I hate being a girl sometimes. You see all those crazy emotions I'm feeling about being kissed? Ha.
It's going to be so easy to get attached to this boy. Gosh, he makes me feel so pretty and comfortable and happy. "I haven't felt this way in such a long time..." I texted my "big sister" Stephanie Callahan. "Have you ever felt this way?" She repiled. This was something I didn't have to ponder for ages. "No, you're right Stephanie. I have never felt this way." And this is exactly what I fear.
I get attached to people.
And I hate it.
I can almost see another disaster happening for me, I pray that I have the strength to stop myself from doing this to the next person. I don't want to hurt myself again. That wound was just too deep.
I'm very much attached to my sister, Caroline. We are thirteen months apart so we're really really close. She's my bestfriend. We are able to steal each other's clothes, makeup, ipods, etc without getting cross with each other. It's really nice. We are shopping and gym partners and we text each other too. I love her so much. She has two bestfriends, Karen and Winston and at times (I have to admit) I get jealous when she tells them secrets and stories that she hasn't told me yet. I know, I know. Ridiculous.
I finally got to see Brody Friday night. We had a really nice date. We were planning to eat out and see a movie, but time wouldn't allow it, so we watched a movie instead. District 9 was our first pick, but Brody has been"riding dirty" and forgot his id/license. He's not even seventeen yet, but he could pass for eighteen and he manges to get into R rated movies anytime. I didn't bother trying my permit, so we had no choice but to see Post Grad.(Which was BEYOND terrible.Waste of money.) Brody and I act like brother and sister rather than a "touchy-feely" couple,and I like that a whole lot. He makes me laugh so much and we're finally getting comfortable around each other. I can act anyhow without feeling stupid or embrassed like the previous dates. I really do like this boy. It's so touching how he actually wants to hear what I have to say. When the movie was about to start, he grabbed my hand and I immediately snuggled up to him and put my head on his shoulder. I love how we both have the same values-everything is just innocent. && as the movie progressed, Brody kissed my forehead. It was so sweet. I kissed him back on the cheek in response. Brody would kiss my forehead at random and just after I kissed him on the cheek, he turned his head and we melted into real kissing.
I honestly hate using the word,"making out" although it was more than a peck. But it was sweet kissing, gentle, and self-controlled , and we were still holding each other's hands. We actually kissed alot. :) It was really lovely. Although, I think( since we both had a little bit of a cough) I'm getting slightly sick. No, no, it's totally not mono. I've never gotten mono but I know it can get pretty serious. I'm feeling fine, just that my cough got slightly worse. Lucky Brody, his went away. HAHA. My friends and everyone else is waiting for us to stop dating and become official. It's been three months since we've started dating. I was actually hoping Brody would ask me to be his girl that very night after those kisses, but perhaps we are already official. We're not into anyone else but each other.
Sigh. I hate being a girl sometimes. You see all those crazy emotions I'm feeling about being kissed? Ha.
It's going to be so easy to get attached to this boy. Gosh, he makes me feel so pretty and comfortable and happy. "I haven't felt this way in such a long time..." I texted my "big sister" Stephanie Callahan. "Have you ever felt this way?" She repiled. This was something I didn't have to ponder for ages. "No, you're right Stephanie. I have never felt this way." And this is exactly what I fear.
Getting attached to this boy.
Because after kissing him "goodbye ,be safe", I realized that it didn't take alot for me to be hooked. I just don't want to lose my good grades and my focus on my SATS over a boy. I like the fact that Brody and I can go two days without communicating. Actually, maybe that's not a good thing. I don't know . I'm confused.
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2 comments:
Hmmm, I just saw District 9 today. Not too good either. I feel the same way about getting close, but sometimes it's good ya know?
I'm fifteen AND I look like a seventh grader, so you'd think it would impossible to get into rated R movies, but I actually got into one without even realizing it WAS rated R! I don't think the movie people really care, haha... But that sucks that it was a waste of money! Definitely not a waste of time though, it sounds like hanging out with Brody was great! Hopefully your confusion gets settled eventually :P
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